Afraid to Be Who You Really Are? What Nichiren Daishonin Wrote About Respecting Every Life

> If you are being threatened, harmed or are in danger because of who you are, please contact your local emergency number or a support helpline now. Your safety comes first. If you are having thoughts of harming yourself, please reach out to a crisis line right away.

When you're living behind a mask

There's a part of you that you keep hidden. Maybe it's your beliefs, or your faith. Maybe it's the culture you come from, or the way your mind works: you're neurodivergent, and you've spent years trying to seem "normal." Maybe it's your sexuality or your gender identity. Maybe it's simply the dreams, opinions or personality that don't match what the people around you expect.

Hiding is exhausting. You edit every sentence. You laugh at jokes that hurt. You wonder what would happen if people knew: whether your family would still accept you, whether friends would stay, whether you'd be safe.

And sometimes there's a deeper fear: that something about who you are is wrong.

If you carry this, please hear this clearly. Buddhism, as the Daishonin taught it, begins from the dignity of every single life. There is nothing about who you are that places you outside that.

What does the Gosho say about being yourself?

Nichiren Daishonin taught that "all beings and environments in the Ten Worlds… are without exception manifestations of Myoho-renge-kyo" (WND-1, 383). Every life, exactly as it is, expresses the Mystic Law. He also wrote that "all living beings without exception can become Buddhas" (WND-1, 58). No one is excluded, and no one needs to become someone else to be worthy.

Without exception

When a disciple asked about the meaning of "the true aspect of all phenomena," the Daishonin answered:

> "It means that all beings and environments in the Ten Worlds, from hell, the lowest, to Buddhahood, the highest, are without exception manifestations of Myoho-renge-kyo." > — The True Aspect of All Phenomena, WND-1, 383

"Without exception." The Daishonin didn't list who counts and who doesn't. Every being, in every condition, is a manifestation of the same profound Law that you chant.

That means your life, the whole of it, including the parts you hide, is not a mistake to be corrected. It is part of the vast and varied expression of life itself.

Respect for every person

In an early letter, the Daishonin explained that the Lotus Sutra proves "that all living beings without exception can become Buddhas":

> "Indeed, T'ien-t'ai established that the attainment of Buddhahood by persons of the two vehicles is proof that all living beings without exception can become Buddhas." > — Questions and Answers about Embracing the Lotus Sutra, WND-1, 58

In the Lotus Sutra, Bodhisattva Never Disparaging bowed to every person he met, recognising the Buddha nature in each of them. The Daishonin called this the heart of the sutra's practice (WND-1, 852).

That respect applies to you, too, from others and from yourself. Being yourself is not selfishness. It is honouring the life you've been given.

Being yourself doesn't mean you have to reveal everything to everyone, or right now. When and with whom you share who you are is your choice, and it's wise to think about safety and timing. But you deserve, at the very least, to stop rejecting yourself.

One small step for tonight

Write down one thing about yourself you've been hiding, and next to it: "This is part of my life, and my life has dignity." You don't have to show anyone.

Think of one person or community where you could be a little more yourself safely, whether a trusted friend, a counsellor or a supportive group. Many communities exist for people from every background, including LGBTQ+ people and neurodivergent people, often with helplines and online spaces.

Chant to accept and respect your own life fully, and for the wisdom and courage to live more truthfully, at a pace that is safe for you.

If you are facing rejection, harassment or threats at home or in your community, please reach out to a trusted support organisation or helpline. You do not have to face this alone.

Your story could help someone else

We don't yet have a member experience focused on accepting and living as one's true self. If you have found the courage to be who you really are, in any part of your identity, and want to share your journey, anonymously if you prefer, it could mean everything to someone reading this page tonight.

Related experiences about self-acceptance and courage are below.

Frequently asked questions

Is there something wrong with who I am?

No. The Daishonin taught that all beings "without exception" are manifestations of the Mystic Law (WND-1, 383). Your life has inherent dignity, exactly as it is.

Does Nichiren Buddhism accept LGBTQ+ people?

The Daishonin's teaching is that every person has the Buddha nature and can attain Buddhahood: "all living beings without exception" (WND-1, 58). Many members around the world are LGBTQ+ and practise openly. In the United States, for example, the SGI-USA has a dedicated group supporting LGBTQ+ members, the Courageous Freedom Group, named by Ikeda Sensei in 2015. If you encounter judgement from others, remember that the Daishonin's teaching itself excludes no one.

Should I tell my family who I really am?

That is your decision, and timing and safety matter. Some people find it helps to talk first with a trusted friend, counsellor or support organisation. You can be true to yourself inwardly long before you share it outwardly.

What should I chant for when I'm afraid to be myself?

Chant to accept and respect your own life, for courage and wisdom, for safety, and for people around you who can understand and support you.

Which Gosho should I read about being myself?

The True Aspect of All Phenomena (WND-1, 383–388) and Questions and Answers about Embracing the Lotus Sutra (WND-1, 55–67).

Sources

All passages are from The Writings of Nichiren Daishonin, Volume I (WND-1):

- The True Aspect of All Phenomena, p. 383 - Questions and Answers about Embracing the Lotus Sutra, p. 58 - On Bodhisattva Never Disparaging: The Three Kinds of Treasure, p. 852