Losing Your Temper Too Easily? What Nichiren Daishonin Wrote About Anger and the Human Heart

When anger arrives before you can stop it

It happens fast. A small thing, a delay, a tone, a mess, someone not listening, and suddenly you're shouting, or saying something cutting, or slamming a door. Afterwards comes the regret: the look on your child's face, the silence from your partner, the colleague who now avoids you.

You promise yourself it won't happen again. Then it does. You may have started to believe this is simply who you are.

If anger is hurting your relationships, and hurting you, the Daishonin was honest about anger, including in his closest disciples, and hopeful about change.

What does the Gosho say about anger?

Nichiren Daishonin taught that "the kalpa of decrease has its origin in the human heart. As the poisons of greed, anger, and foolishness gradually intensify," life diminishes (WND-1, 1120). Anger is one of the three poisons every person carries. He also wrote, with humility, that "in the vast depths of our greed, anger, and foolishness, we commit the ten evil acts every day" (WND-1, 77). You are not uniquely flawed. And because anger arises in the heart, the heart is also where it can be transformed.

Anger begins in the heart

In one of his letters, the Daishonin explained why the world becomes harsher over time:

> "The kalpa of decrease has its origin in the human heart. As the poisons of greed, anger, and foolishness gradually intensify, the life span of human beings gradually decreases and their stature diminishes." > — The Kalpa of Decrease, WND-1, 1120

Anger, in Buddhism, is a poison: not a sin to be ashamed of, but something that harms the one who carries it and those around them. And it has its origin in the heart, not in the other person, not in the situation.

That's actually good news. If anger came only from circumstances, you'd be at their mercy. Because it comes from within, it can be changed from within.

Everyone carries it

In a letter to a sick follower, the Daishonin included himself among those who struggle:

> "In the vast depths of our greed, anger, and foolishness, we commit the ten evil acts every day." > — Encouragement to a Sick Person, WND-1, 77

"Our" greed, anger and foolishness. Not "your." The Daishonin didn't look down on anyone for having these poisons. He treated them as part of the human condition to be transformed.

He was also frank with his own disciple Shijo Kingo, telling him his face bore "definite signs of a hot temper" (WND-1, 849), and warning him that losing his temper could undo everything he had worked for. It was not condemnation. It was the honesty of a teacher who wanted his disciple to win.

One small step for tonight

Think of your last outburst. Write down what happened just before it: tired, hungry, unheard, embarrassed, afraid? Anger often sits on top of another feeling.

Choose one "pause" signal: leaving the room, ten slow breaths, silently repeating Nam-myoho-renge-kyo three times. Use it the next time you feel the heat rising.

Chant to transform the poison of anger at its source, and, if you hurt someone recently, for the courage to apologise. If anger ever turns into violence or threats, please seek professional help immediately; anger management programmes and counselling are very effective.

From short-tempered to steady

Suresh lost his father at ten and grew up watching his mother run a small tea shop to support the family. As a young man he became short-tempered and restless, searching for peace and not finding it. A friend introduced him to Buddhism. Over more than two decades of practice, he gradually became steadier and more trusting, and long-strained relationships in his extended family were healed, including a reconciliation between his grandfather and grand-uncle after nearly twenty years. Later, while caring for his mother through cancer, he built his career, studied law and moved into a role with greater responsibility.

His story, and others like it, are below.

Frequently asked questions

How can I control my anger?

Notice your early warning signs, use a pause before reacting, and address the feelings underneath. The Daishonin taught that anger "has its origin in the human heart" (WND-1, 1120), which means the heart is where it can be transformed.

Am I a bad person because I get angry?

No. The Daishonin counted himself among those affected by "greed, anger, and foolishness" (WND-1, 77). What matters is your determination to change.

What should I chant for to overcome anger?

Chant to transform anger at its root, for patience and wisdom in difficult moments, and for the happiness of the people you tend to get angry with.

How do I repair the damage I've done?

Apologise sincerely and specifically, without excuses, and show change over time. Our article on guilt and regret may also help.

Which Gosho should I read about anger?

The Kalpa of Decrease (WND-1, 1120–1124) and The Three Kinds of Treasure (WND-1, 848–853).

Sources

All passages are from The Writings of Nichiren Daishonin, Volume I (WND-1):

- The Kalpa of Decrease, p. 1120 - Encouragement to a Sick Person, p. 77 - The Three Kinds of Treasure, p. 849